In Which a Regular Human Guy Does Nothing for Almost 3 Years
"My name is Tuscon Arizonia, Human Bartender."
- Senek Thebard
The Back-Alley Wizards wasted no time in plane shifting Senek Thebard to Shurrock, taking his money, and immediately returning to the Demonweb. Even though he had never been to Bytopia, Senek knew his reputation and magical items would eventually reveal his true nature. Thus, he doffed all of his armor, weapons, spell components, magical accoutrements, and anything else that might register with any divination spells. He stuffed them all into his bag of holding, which he then hid away into one of his gloves of storing (as these had been a recent purchase, no one in this part of the timeline knew Senek would have them). Now outfitted with only his pants, a couple platinum coins, and one glove, he made his way through the wilderness, hoping to find somewhere he could lay low for awhile.
As he moved, Senek began crafting a needlessly complicated backstory for the identity he would have to assume. After cleverly dodging several celestial predators, Senek found himself in a quaint village of gnomes. He introduced himself as Tuscon Arizonia, a human from the Outlands. He made sure to ham up his performance as a human, adding layers to his character that suggested he was anything but a human, and desperately trying to pass as one. After purchasing some new threads, Senek met a local merchant who wanted to sell his tavern and move to Dothion, the other layer of Bytopia. After successfully negotiating for a reasonable price, Senek bought the bar.
Life on Shurrock was rougher than Senek had imagined, with violent, unpredictable weather and wild predators lurking in the surrounding woods and mountains. It seemed to always be the dead of winter or the middle of summer—far from the paradise that he had been led to believe after hearing about Bytopia from the gnomes.
Still, Senek dutifully played his part. For almost three years, "Tuscon" ingratiated himself with the locals of Shurrock, offering them quality human beers as reasonable princes, and any inconsistencies that came up about his past were hand-waved as part of his confusing human travels around the gate towns of the Outlands. Toward the end of his self-imposed exile, Tuscon even became a sponsor of the local girls' maypole team, and his fundraising efforts even helped them get to the Bytopia regional championships.
Unfortunately, the competition was in Dothion, and the gnomes of Shurrock were (rightfully) too afraid to traverse the wilds to cross over to the other planar layer. However, after three years of playing a commoner, Senek yearned for a little excitement. Besides, the girls had worked hard, and they deserved to go to regionals! And so, Tuscon offered to lead the expedition, refusing to back down in the face of danger. The gnomes cheered him, and outfitted him with ill-fitting, low-level adventuring gear as they prepared to embark on an adventure.
In truth, even without Senek's magical gear, "Tuscon" still had the stats of an almost god-tier adventurer. He could balance, bluff, diplomacize, perform, and easily make whatever saves he needed in order to get safely across the Peak of Continuation and into Dothion, and whatever monsters lurked over there.
The journey was fraught with peril, but the gnomes were thankful to have Tuscon, who seemed to be able to talk down any threat and lead them to safely. Finally, they arrived in Dothion, a place Senek had only heard of, and just assumed it was as bad or worse as Shurrock.
It immediately became clear that without someone like Luethil or Kashro to make a planar knowledge check, Senek had been very, very wrong.
Dothion was a balmy, mild paradise. The air was sweet, the breezes cool, and every day seemed to be a warm spring or a cool autumn. Life was easy, the gnomes were friendly, and one could easily spend years relaxing without a care in the world.
Senek was furious. He had been on the wrong layer the whole time, spending the last three years of his life battening down hatches, bracing against hurricanes, fighting celestial tigers with homemade spears, and sweating on hot days and shivering through cold, lonely nights when only a mere 20 miles away, life was eternally set on easy mode.
However, before he could enjoy the luxury of Dothion, his time was up. In the Abyss, the other version of himself was currently trying to bargain with Pazuzu to get sent back through time to alter the Pact of the Spider Queen. As the girls arrived at the stadium where the maypole competition was held, "Tuscon" suddenly remembered he had left some human things back at the bar, and that he needed them forthwith and immediately.
With the bar closed due to the maypole competition, Senek had the privacy he needed to once again don all of his gear. In no time at all, he was able to easily cast the spells necessary to start a fire and burn the establishment to the ground, as well as faking "Tuscon's" death.
Senek was sad that he would never be able to say a proper goodbye to his new friends, but he had to return to Lonn as though no time had passed at all. Forgoing the haircut he so desperately needed, Senek returned to the Abyss from where Pazuzu had granted his wish so many years ago (the Prince of the Lower Aerial Kingdoms was nowhere to be seen upon the Bard's return). From there, Senek used his Cubic Gate to return back home to Puckett's Ridge.